In English there is the concept of “the terrible twos”, lasting from before the 2nd birthday until after the 3rd birthday. The Swedish term is more evocative – “trotsåldern” or the “age of defiance”.

While there is nothing terrible about Ingrid’s behaviour, she has definitely become more oppositional and negative recently. Quite often her first reaction to whatever I offer is no!, only to make an about-turn seconds later.

H: Kas sa tahad piima?
I (angrily): Inte piima!
…10 seconds pass…
I (giggling): Ikka piima!

H: Do you want some milk?
I: Not milk!
…
I: Yes milk!

Or how about this, more enlightening example:

H: I’m going to take a shower. Do you want to shower with me?
I: Not shower!
H gets into shower.
I (crying): Shower!
H: Do you want to shower?
I (running away angrily): Not shower!
H turns on the water
I (crying): Shower!
H: Shall I take off your pajama top?
I (angrily): Not shower!
H (finally understanding): Can you take off your pajama top yourself?
I takes off pajama top with just a bit of help and holds up her arms to be lifted into the bath, and continues to shower happily.

It’s all about independence. Apparently, sometimes even offers of milk insult her sense of independence.