My first-ever attempt at sourdough bread.

Eric was the master baker in the house. Now that he’s not here, I need to learn to bake my own bread. Because I’m not going to be living on store-bought bread only.

For him it was a hobby; for me the process is not that interesting, and technical mastery is irrelevant. So I’m choosing the easy, low-effort route. For today: a no-knead sourdough bread.

First learning point: put the dough to rise in a warmer place. I had it in the kitchen at first, because that is where one bakes, but the dough wouldn’t rise. Moved it to the living room, under the heat pump, and things started happening.

Second learning point: even though the dough looks all gluey, you don’t actually need that much flour when handling it.

Third learning point: do not try to puff up the loaves before putting them in the oven. Even though the book says you can. They’ll just lose their form entirely and you end up with very misshapen loaves.

Fourth learning point: bake the loaves lower in the oven, or lower temperature compared to what the recipe says. These would have benefited from a bit more time in the oven, but the edges were nearly starting to burn.

Despite all of the above, the loaves rose, the texture was only a little bit doughy, and the taste was good.

It’s very blowy and snowy outside. The worst of the wind passed us during the night, blowing down string lights and driving snow into odd corners. Now there’s tons of fresh snow everywhere. Luckily the temperature stayed just below zero, so the snow was easy to work with. The last dump of snow, earlier this week, was immediately followed by rain and a thaw, which wasn’t enough to not actually melt all of the snow – just long enough to make it really wet and heavy. And then freezing temperatures the next night, so I had one evening to clear it all away, or deal with thick clumps of ice on all the stairs and driveways.

The municipal snow ploughs have cleared the streets, but haven’t had time to remove the snow, so it’s all piled up along the sides of the streets. And since I have a sturdy retaining wall towards the street, whereas the neighbours across the street have a lilac hedge, the snow ploughs – very reasonably – push most of it to our side. Now I’m running out of space where to put the snow.

Clearing everything after a decent-sized (but not extreme) snowfall takes about an hour and a quarter. That covers the staircases (upper and lower), the landing between them, the landing towards the street, the spaces in front of the mailbox and the rubbish bins, the car, the driveway, the wooden deck, and the stairs down from the deck to the driveway. A good workout.

The snow pusher is still great – and not just for the driveway. I’ve figured out a technique to use it on the lower, concrete stairs, too. Hold it parallel with the stairs, as close to vertical as possible, and I can push the snow down from one stair to the next. Two such pushes is enough to clear an entire step in no more than twenty seconds. And then I have a pile of snow on street level, where it is easy to clear. So I replace lifting and shovelling with pushing, which is much easier on the back and arms.

My new employer offers free massages on Fridays. Can you believe it?

They mentioned it during the interviewing process and it sounded almost too good to be true. What’s the catch, I thought? And it wasn’t even difficult to get a slot – when I booked mine on Thursday evening, half the slots were still free.

This was very, very nice. Afterwards, my body felt like a fluffy, soft pillow. And I was extra aware of all the times I tensed my shoulders.

Weaving in the ends of my latest knit sweater. I finished it last year already (ha ha) but I haven’t gotten around to finishing it. Very close now!

This was one of the years where the holidays all fall on weekdays, so you get maximum amount of Christmas break for a minimum of vacation days spent. I was home for 17 days, for the cost of 5 vacation days.

Yesterday was my first day back at work after the break. I spent most of it on getting my new computer up and running. It was all installation files and license keys and VPN configurations and access tokens. Bleh.

Today was my first full day at the office at Active Solution. I was told that Wednesdays are a good day to come in if I want to meet people, because there is Wednesday fika in the afternoon.

The office had a very homey vibe, quite unlike the sleek lines of the tretton37 office. A slightly labyrinthine layout, soft carpets in muted tones, throw pillows, and lots of plants.

Eric finalized his move on Friday. I have the house to myself until Sunday afternoon/evening, when the kids will come for their week here.

The quiet feels particularly calming after the stress of last week. Like breathing out, and putting down a heavy weight. A lightness.

I don’t think I’ve quite settled into this new reality yet. It feels temporary.

My to-do list is massive. There are things to buy replacements for, closets and shelves and drawers to sort through, decisions to make. Good thing I have more time and more energy than in a long time.

Eric and I had two single beds put together, because we preferred mattresses with different firmness, with a double-width mattress topper on top. Now we detached them from each other and took one each.

It only took me one night to discover that a single bed feels much narrower than half of a double bed. I have to take care all the time to not lose the blanket over the edge of the bed. (I feel like there’s some kind of metaphor in there, for the end of a relationship.)

My plan was to make do with a narrow bed for a few months, until I have time to figure out how I want to furnish my bedroom in the longer term. Get a feel for the space, consider what else I might want in here.

That’s a bit of a chain of projects, though: before I invest in a new bed frame, I want to see the rest of the room as it will be. That means getting rid of the large double wardrobe in the middle of the room. For that to happen, I need to move my clothes into one or more of the built-in closets on the other side of the room. And that in turn requires me to sort through the stuff that is currently there, so I can make space.

I’m reconsidering that plan, though, because this is not very comfortable.

I declared Christmas finished today. Packed away the decorations and took out the Christmas tree, washed and ironed the party tablecloths and napkins. By my estimations, I ironed roughly 8.5 square metres of linen tablecloth. That took a while.

A few snapshots from the Bergheden family Christmas party. Food (potluck style), conversations, and presents for the kids.

Revisiting stage 1 of Signature Trail Stockholm, roughly two years after the first time.

Same trail, same season, but different weather, and what a difference it makes. Last time was cloudy; today I had beautiful clear skies. There were rather more people around. Instead of a dreamlike atmosphere, it was bright and fresh.

Not that the sun was actually directly visible much of the time. It was there and it made a difference, but it was also mostly out of reach, even at high noon.

Last time was in February and the ice had settled on lake Mälaren. This time we’ve barely had any winter weather and the lake was mostly ice-free. At most there were thin slabs of ice in the most protected corner of the bay at Görväln.

An undulating layer of broken-up ice, like the skin of an ice dragon:

Lunch break at the same place as last year. I was hungry way before getting there but with the temperature being what it was, I really didn’t feel like sitting down in the shade somewhere. Knowing that, if nothing better came up, I’d have this spot at least, I kept going. The picnic table was perfectly positioned to get some sun on it. Nevertheless I ate as quickly as I could because it felt like my fingers were going to turn into icicles, despite thick gloves. Mittens are the only thing that really keep my hands warm but eating with them on is inconvenient.

The golf course towards the end of the trail was, like the rest of the trail, the same but not the same. Last year it was desolate in mist. This year – full of tobogganing kids and skiing adults.

Ingrid has been working extra at Spånga Konditori, a local café, since the start of this school year. Manning the till, serving cakes, brewing coffee, selling bread, etc etc. She’s been bringing home all sorts of goodies – from rescued day-old leftover bread that would otherwise go in the bin (my colleagues have gotten so much sourdough bread from that place!) to super-fancy pastries that she can buy at a nice employee discount.

I’ve been wanting to stop by to visit her and take some photos, which sounds uncomplicated, but the tricky part is doing it without disrupting her work. She mostly works weekends, for a number of obvious reasons, and weekends at the café are busy. They’re not quite understaffed, but they’re also not not understaffed. Now during the Christmas break, she was available for work on a Friday, and I got my chance.

Looking super professional!