A new kitchen deserves a new table. The old table is not in as bad a shape as the old oven (which is literally falling apart) but it’s wobbly and worn, and using it or looking at it definitely does not spark any joy in me.

Varnished veneer doesn’t age well. The next table will be solid oiled wood that we can simply sand down and re-apply oil to when all the kneading and baking takes its toll. And it will have thick, solid legs and a thick, solid top that the kids can climb on without having to worry about its stability.

The one thing that is just perfect about the current table is its size. We would feel cramped sitting around it if the table was smaller – and the kitchen would feel cramped if the table was bigger. We didn’t even buy this table for this kitchen but one in London, and it was pure luck that it fit so well here.

So naturally I went looking for a new one of roughly similar size, give a take a few centimetres – and found nothing. Our table is 90 cm wide, and every table I found online was either 75 or 80 – most small 4-seat tables were 80 by 120 cm. I guess people want nice, round measurements. But giving up 10 per cent of the width would make a noticeable difference… How come we found a 90 cm table and why aren’t there any more out there?

Once I measured the table’s length to 127 cm, I understood why. Our table was designed by someone who thought in inches. It measures a tidy 35 x 50 inches in its half-expanded state, and those are of course very nice and round numbers.

If we want a table of this perfect size, and there are none to be bought, I guess someone will have to build one. How hard can it be?