Ingrid has suddenly started reading more actual books, not just Kalle Anka pocket. We went to a bookstore and bought a bunch of books together during Christmas break, and now she’s reading them and almost every one is “best book ever!”. The books she chose were all fantasy and (mild) horror stories. Current favourites: Rum 213 by Ingelin Angerborn, Stjärnstenen by Jo Salmson.

Normally I read for her at bedtime. Today for the first time ever Ingrid got so deep into a book in the evening that we missed our story time. She just couldn’t put the book down.

Otherwise it’s the usual digital entertainments: games, YouTube, etc. Current favourite game: The Sims 4.

She worries. She is more and more aware that she is growing up, and isn’t quite happy about it. She tells me she’d rather stay a child and relive her childhood years. She worries about ageing and dying, and about having to decide on a career, and having to choose a university, and getting into university, and having to move away from home. She sees adulthood at the horizon and is anxious about her ability to manage it. I guess it all looks like a burden from where she’s standing.

She is really sensitive to negative events and others’ negative opinions. They drag her down, and she has a hard time getting past them. A disappointment in the morning can set the tone and ruin a whole day. Even when it’s Adrian saying something slightly negative, she’s hurt – and he’s just a six-year-old. When he hugs her good-bye, for example, he finishes by pushing her off and saying “go now!” – and she takes that as rejection.

I guess she is unsure of her place in the world, and of her value. She doesn’t show it much of the time but that low self-esteem seems to be there under the surface.