Top five unhelpful things you can say to your toddler, especially if the child is crying, angry, sad or upset – learned from actual playground encounters:

  • Sluta! (Stop that!)
  • Skärp dig! (A direct translation would be “Pull yourself together!’ but I guess in English you’d say something like “Behave yourself” instead.)
  • Vad är det för fel på dig?! (What’s wrong with you?!)
  • Nu lägger du av. (You will stop that right this moment.)
  • Varför ska du vara så jobbig? (Why do you have to be so difficult?)

Every time I hear a variation on this theme I can just imagine the toddler thinking, Thanks for the reminder – I had totally forgotten that crying is not the accepted method of argumentation in this setting. Of course I will stop. Not.